Dear Dr. Bienenfeld,
My daughter, Lauren, age 24 suffers from depression. She has worked on and off with professionals over the past 6 years. She had to drop out of college due to poor attendance and focusing issues. She has ADD, depression, is overweight and has no friends. I brought her home from college, once again, in March of 2015. I decided that we HAVE to get to the bottom of her depression issues. I currently have her working with a psychiatrist once a month and a psychologist twice a month. I requested she have a full physical exam, and had her referred to both an endrinconologist and a dietician. We are currently waiting on the referral appointments. She has low iron and she has started taking iron supplements in addition to her multi vitamins. We joined a health club, but she shows no interest in attending. She still spends several hours a day in her room. Her psychologist says she is "stuck". She is not happy with the major she has selected ( English) and has earned 106 hours. She is not interested in finishing the degree, yet, without a degree....she can't attend screenwriting school. She claims this is what she wants to study. Yet, I see no interest on her part. Doctor, I am scared. I want her to be happy, healthy, and ready for the challenges of life. I, too, suffered depression due to a bad marriage. Yet, I worked to "come back" and did so in about a year. Is there any hope for my daughter? She has no reason to be sad. Her needs are met, her bills are paid and I do not want to be part of the problem. She is not working and my sister, a chiropractor, is going to let her work as an office assistant starting tomorrow for a few hours a day. I feel as though I am the one who is caring, trying to figure out her issues and being proactive. She will lie and tell me what I want to hear. I am seriously considering placing her in a long-term facility or program to finally get a hold on her problems. She started having attendance issues in school in 9th grade. After going on medication, she seemed to be moderately happy, attended school and participated in drama in high school and had a handful of friends. That was 6 years ago. She has no friends, sees former friends getting their degrees, getting married, starting careers, etc. and she is feeling even worse. I have been trying to be supportive, allowing her time to rest and destress, but how long should I wait for her to move forward? She is taking Aderol 40 mg of extended release. Prozac 20 mg each day. She takes birth control pills to regulate her difficult periods. She takes her meds in the am. She takes vitamins at night. She simply acts negative and makes excuses for not growing up and moving forward. Any suggestions? After 5 months, should I consider placing her in a treatment facility that specializes in depression/ADD? I am confused, stressed, and feel that I am the one who is worried about her future...not her. Her brother is happy, confident, in college and doing very well. She has always been jealous of his accomplishments and that has been an issue in the past. Our relationship is good on most days, then when I talk to her about how she thinks she is doing, she gets indignant and mean. I divorced her father when she was 12. I guess I always thought that her problems stemmed from this tragic event in her young life. Yet, she claims that I did the best thing for our family by bringing peace to our home. Her father suffers from depression as well. He lost his law practice, remarried, and is living on disability. He did not participate in co-parenting and I assumed full responsibility for Lauren and her brother. Is there hope for my daughter? I am open to ideas, suggestions, etc. Thanks so much for reading this lengthy note.
Mary Weber
Parkersburg, West Virginia