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Do Gabapentin And Percocet Affect One's Personality Traits To Become Manipulative And Brash?
Question: am in a relationship where I get more confused everyday . Part of me thinks he nuts then the other part thinks I’m nuts. Been together a year . I moved to be with him with my two kids (17,14) breakdown of issues: blocked people from my phone, emailed my job to get me fired, may have called my sons job to get him fired ( he swears he didn’t) killed animals pets when mad . Takes picture of my car at his house because we had a child to prove I come there . Since baby has been born he’s been great. My son refuses to move back because he was mean and horrible to him . Not to my daughter just him . My son can be lazy and rude . However rules where he had to walk after school for 3 hours to meet friends . Clean his room which even if it was clean he would find something while my daughters room was a mess . He says he is willing to try to make it work with my son but after that conversation with me my son says he called his job trying to get him fired . I believe my son he had no motivation to lie . I just don’t understand . Sometimes he’s amazing and others I see him doing things to like ruin my life . I am extremely lonely have no friends or family beside my kids and now a newborn. He used to make me cook clean while I was working 60 hours a week and even made me take maternity leave early (5 months) cause he hated my job. When I left I had a car I was making payments on he towed it and had it impounded without telling me we were still trying to get back together . He threw out a bunch of the baby stuff which he swears he didn’t . But now all of a sudden he’s perfect to me . Says that was in the past and he changed . He has a deep obeesion with keeping me with him all the time . I know he wants me to lmove back in and having no one it’s great to have that person that is totally obsessed with you and calls you a million times a day . Do you have an idea of what is going on cause I don’t thank you also when I leave his house he makes me leav something of value to make sure I come back but we have broke up before so I kinda understand that
I want to say he is very loyal to me . He is on disability and stays at home all day . He never waivers in not wanting to be with me . It’s my kids and the crazy weird stuff he does that scares me sometimes . He tells me I’m
Crazy and swears he didn’t do it . He really
Acts like he wants this to work I’m just scared if I move back in things will get iffy . He does take 4 Perocet and gabatein a day due to his disability I am not sure if this effects his personality. He also is very very quite sometimes says he’s in pain. He just sits and watches spongebob all day and is an obsessive cleaner
Last thing he sAys he did those things like call my job to protect me because my job is too stressful. But that’s all in the past and he’s changed he doesn’t care about anything but me and his daughter being with him .
I really want this to work I don’t want to be alone and I know he will not see his daughter if I don’t
I want to say he is very loyal to me . He is on disability and stays at home all day . He never waivers in not wanting to be with me . It’s my kids and the crazy weird stuff he does that scares me sometimes . He tells me I’m
Crazy and swears he didn’t do it . He really
Acts like he wants this to work I’m just scared if I move back in things will get iffy . He does take 4 Perocet and gabatein a day due to his disability I am not sure if this effects his personality. He also is very very quite sometimes says he’s in pain. He just sits and watches spongebob all day and is an obsessive cleaner
Last thing he sAys he did those things like call my job to protect me because my job is too stressful. But that’s all in the past and he’s changed he doesn’t care about anything but me and his daughter being with him .
I really want this to work I don’t want to be alone and I know he will not see his daughter if I don’t
Brief Answer:
Information
Detailed Answer:
Hi,
I read through what you wrote here and it sounds pretty frustrating. I do believe he wants to be with you and maybe is very loyal to you.
That said, I do not think this is a healthy situation at all. I think your affection for him and loneliness maybe getting the better of your judgement here. He may meet those needs (affection and not being lonely) for a while, but I believe, based on the things you listed here, that he has serious mental health issues. It may be difficult to separate after a year, but that is what you will need to do and not let him 'gaslight' you into thinking your observations and interpretations are incorrect.
Here are definite concerns. They are beyond just being red flags:
1. He called your work and then lied about it and tried to manipulate you into thinking it was okay because he was looking out for your well being. Even if he was trying to look out for your well being, calling a partners work without their consent is definitely crossing a line.
2. Was and is horrible to your son. That is unacceptable.
3. Called your son's work to get him fired. How is this even remotely okay?
4. He is manipulative regarding your work, cooking etc.
The reason you wrote in is because what he tells you does not match with what you know inside to be true, and what your son has told you, yet he seems kind and devoted to you. This will make a person feel confused. Furthermore, some of the things he told you he now tells you were not true, but that he was doing them for your well being. That violates your rights to autonomy. I recommend reading through what you wrote to me, from the perspective of if this was a friend you cared about or your child. What would you recommend they do? I think you will know the answer.
A big issue is that you are feeling lonely and it doesn't sound like you have much emotional support available to you. Can you think of things in your community you can do that might, over time, help you to develop friends? A church group, or a common interest group (there are lots of these - people who like to scrap book, people who like to knit, etc - you can find these in a local paper or online). Taking a class at the community college can be a way (sometimes) to find like minded people. Volunteering in a group (that helps a cause you might be interested in) is another way to find folks - and extend your self, ask others to join you for coffee.
I am sorry that what I have written may not be what you want to hear, or at least may not be the easiest solution, but I want to encourage you to trust yourself and your judgement in your current living situation.
I hope my answers helps you.
Regards,
Dr. Bonnie Berger-Durnbaugh
General & Family Physician
Information
Detailed Answer:
Hi,
I read through what you wrote here and it sounds pretty frustrating. I do believe he wants to be with you and maybe is very loyal to you.
That said, I do not think this is a healthy situation at all. I think your affection for him and loneliness maybe getting the better of your judgement here. He may meet those needs (affection and not being lonely) for a while, but I believe, based on the things you listed here, that he has serious mental health issues. It may be difficult to separate after a year, but that is what you will need to do and not let him 'gaslight' you into thinking your observations and interpretations are incorrect.
Here are definite concerns. They are beyond just being red flags:
1. He called your work and then lied about it and tried to manipulate you into thinking it was okay because he was looking out for your well being. Even if he was trying to look out for your well being, calling a partners work without their consent is definitely crossing a line.
2. Was and is horrible to your son. That is unacceptable.
3. Called your son's work to get him fired. How is this even remotely okay?
4. He is manipulative regarding your work, cooking etc.
The reason you wrote in is because what he tells you does not match with what you know inside to be true, and what your son has told you, yet he seems kind and devoted to you. This will make a person feel confused. Furthermore, some of the things he told you he now tells you were not true, but that he was doing them for your well being. That violates your rights to autonomy. I recommend reading through what you wrote to me, from the perspective of if this was a friend you cared about or your child. What would you recommend they do? I think you will know the answer.
A big issue is that you are feeling lonely and it doesn't sound like you have much emotional support available to you. Can you think of things in your community you can do that might, over time, help you to develop friends? A church group, or a common interest group (there are lots of these - people who like to scrap book, people who like to knit, etc - you can find these in a local paper or online). Taking a class at the community college can be a way (sometimes) to find like minded people. Volunteering in a group (that helps a cause you might be interested in) is another way to find folks - and extend your self, ask others to join you for coffee.
I am sorry that what I have written may not be what you want to hear, or at least may not be the easiest solution, but I want to encourage you to trust yourself and your judgement in your current living situation.
I hope my answers helps you.
Regards,
Dr. Bonnie Berger-Durnbaugh
General & Family Physician
Note: For further guidance on mental health, Click here.
Above answer was peer-reviewed by :
Dr. Chakravarthy Mazumdar
Answered by
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