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Gradual Disinterest In Physical Intimacy. What Could Be The Reason?
Question: hi,
i am XXXXXXX from kolkaka india.age30 .married from past 4 yrs.got married in 2008.and from 2009 dec i dont have any physical relationship with my husban.innitially it was very much normal...but slowly slowly i have notieced that he is loosing intrest .i have also approched many times but he always had denied with the reason that he is tired.i dint say anything to him till last nov 2011.after having a convorsation with my mother i realized this is very much important for a married couple.due to my shy nature i have hided this from them .doctor as per me he has no physical disorder but why it had happen ?.....he still say that he was tired thats why he could not do.he gives reason of being occupied with his work.i am not ready to belive that...kindly give me some advice in this matter.
i am XXXXXXX from kolkaka india.age30 .married from past 4 yrs.got married in 2008.and from 2009 dec i dont have any physical relationship with my husban.innitially it was very much normal...but slowly slowly i have notieced that he is loosing intrest .i have also approched many times but he always had denied with the reason that he is tired.i dint say anything to him till last nov 2011.after having a convorsation with my mother i realized this is very much important for a married couple.due to my shy nature i have hided this from them .doctor as per me he has no physical disorder but why it had happen ?.....he still say that he was tired thats why he could not do.he gives reason of being occupied with his work.i am not ready to belive that...kindly give me some advice in this matter.
Hi,XXXXXXX
Thanks for posting your query.
I can appreciate your concern and dilemma.
Yes, your mother is right, healthy sex life one of the important pillar of marriage life. Everybody has right to enjoy the life.
Looking to the details provided by your there seems to be some possible reason for this loss of interest in the act.
1. Stress-this is most the common problem now a day. With increasing stress day by day this first thing that gets affected.
2. Performance anxiety:
3. Some phobia, fear in mind
4. Some medical health problems like depression etc.
First of all please try to speak to him about this when ever he is relatively relaxed. Show your desires and take the lead. Have some good time away from family and friends on vacation or short break. Expression of feeling is must for both of you. Dialogue has to remain open. Please do not insult him, keep your love and affection for him same as it was before. He should not feel lonely in this situation.
Apart from this you should seek help from a professional. 4 years is pretty long time and this is the time do something concrete for this. Please consult one doctor in your city for counseling. You can consult any psychiatrist for this. You can even take guidance of your family physician who knows the entire family well.
Please do not worry, this is a transient phase and it will definitely go.
I hope this answers your query, I will be glad to reply any follow up query that you have.
In case you do not have any further query, please accept the answer.
Wishing you best of health.
Regards,
Dr.Pragnesh
Thanks for posting your query.
I can appreciate your concern and dilemma.
Yes, your mother is right, healthy sex life one of the important pillar of marriage life. Everybody has right to enjoy the life.
Looking to the details provided by your there seems to be some possible reason for this loss of interest in the act.
1. Stress-this is most the common problem now a day. With increasing stress day by day this first thing that gets affected.
2. Performance anxiety:
3. Some phobia, fear in mind
4. Some medical health problems like depression etc.
First of all please try to speak to him about this when ever he is relatively relaxed. Show your desires and take the lead. Have some good time away from family and friends on vacation or short break. Expression of feeling is must for both of you. Dialogue has to remain open. Please do not insult him, keep your love and affection for him same as it was before. He should not feel lonely in this situation.
Apart from this you should seek help from a professional. 4 years is pretty long time and this is the time do something concrete for this. Please consult one doctor in your city for counseling. You can consult any psychiatrist for this. You can even take guidance of your family physician who knows the entire family well.
Please do not worry, this is a transient phase and it will definitely go.
I hope this answers your query, I will be glad to reply any follow up query that you have.
In case you do not have any further query, please accept the answer.
Wishing you best of health.
Regards,
Dr.Pragnesh
Note: For further guidance on mental health, Click here.
Above answer was peer-reviewed by :
Dr. Chakravarthy Mazumdar
Answered by
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