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How To Handle Cranky Behavior And Craving For Mother's Love In An Infant By Working Mother?
Question: Hello Doctor,
I am having a very difficult time with my baby due to the below reason
1) As I took an one year break and stayed with my baby now she is very much attached with me.
2) Now when I have joined my work , She suddenly become vey nagy and my paretns are not able to manage her at all more than 3-4 hours
3) As she understood that I leave her for work for some times , now she start crying even when she notices me to leave the room.
4) one day I stayed at work for 9 hours and my baby developed dark circle below her eyes.
5) Today she understood that when she sleeps I go out for some work and now she is also scared to sleep at night.
I am not able to understand will this habit change in some days or will this affect my babies health as she cries a lot without me around. However she is taking normal food.
Moreover anything we can do to pacify her or to change her habit? If nothing works out I have to quit my job
I am having a very difficult time with my baby due to the below reason
1) As I took an one year break and stayed with my baby now she is very much attached with me.
2) Now when I have joined my work , She suddenly become vey nagy and my paretns are not able to manage her at all more than 3-4 hours
3) As she understood that I leave her for work for some times , now she start crying even when she notices me to leave the room.
4) one day I stayed at work for 9 hours and my baby developed dark circle below her eyes.
5) Today she understood that when she sleeps I go out for some work and now she is also scared to sleep at night.
I am not able to understand will this habit change in some days or will this affect my babies health as she cries a lot without me around. However she is taking normal food.
Moreover anything we can do to pacify her or to change her habit? If nothing works out I have to quit my job
Brief Answer:
The level of care provided by the alternate caregiver matters
Detailed Answer:
Thanks for asking on HealthcareMagic.
You have incidentally not mentioned the age of the baby. Anyway, going by the description, I assume that the child is a few months old. The problem that you are facing, is not unique. Such problems are faced by numerous working mothers. Let me address the issues one by one.
Babies of such age crave for their mother. They identify their mother by the smell and touch. But most often this is related to the breast feeding. The child likes to breast feed. This makes you unique. But for working mothers, there has to be some alternate caregiver. Most often the transition to the alternate caregiver is smooth. The child is not yet mature enough to feel what is known as 'separation anxiety'. So if the alternate caregiver, most often the father, can take up the role effectively, no problem occurs. The problem in role transition occurs when there is a significant difference in the level of care that you provide instead of him when you are there for a few days. It could also reflect the anxiety of your partner who might have a feeling of being an inadequate parent. You would have to resolve this problem before you try to address the problem faced by the baby.
At this age, the demands of the baby are quite basic. so, when you feel that the baby is not doing well simply because you were out for long, it is because her demands for care and food have not been met adequately. It is perhaps not due to missing you per se. This primarily reflects the inconfidence of your partner and because of the fact that he/she feels that you (after quitting your job) would be better able to handle the baby. I feel that if you can look into this factor effectively by proper reassurance and motivation, the problem on the child's part would disappear without any specific intervention to pacify her.
The level of care provided by the alternate caregiver matters
Detailed Answer:
Thanks for asking on HealthcareMagic.
You have incidentally not mentioned the age of the baby. Anyway, going by the description, I assume that the child is a few months old. The problem that you are facing, is not unique. Such problems are faced by numerous working mothers. Let me address the issues one by one.
Babies of such age crave for their mother. They identify their mother by the smell and touch. But most often this is related to the breast feeding. The child likes to breast feed. This makes you unique. But for working mothers, there has to be some alternate caregiver. Most often the transition to the alternate caregiver is smooth. The child is not yet mature enough to feel what is known as 'separation anxiety'. So if the alternate caregiver, most often the father, can take up the role effectively, no problem occurs. The problem in role transition occurs when there is a significant difference in the level of care that you provide instead of him when you are there for a few days. It could also reflect the anxiety of your partner who might have a feeling of being an inadequate parent. You would have to resolve this problem before you try to address the problem faced by the baby.
At this age, the demands of the baby are quite basic. so, when you feel that the baby is not doing well simply because you were out for long, it is because her demands for care and food have not been met adequately. It is perhaps not due to missing you per se. This primarily reflects the inconfidence of your partner and because of the fact that he/she feels that you (after quitting your job) would be better able to handle the baby. I feel that if you can look into this factor effectively by proper reassurance and motivation, the problem on the child's part would disappear without any specific intervention to pacify her.
Note: For further queries related to your child health, Talk to a Pediatrician. Click here to Book a Consultation.
Above answer was peer-reviewed by :
Dr. Chakravarthy Mazumdar
Answered by
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