
How To Overcome Fear Of Contracting HIV Despite Involving In Outercourse Sexual Activities?

I am a 35 Yr old woman prone to anxiety attacks. Recently I was in a relationship with a man.Now the relationship has ended. Due to the stress of the break up my anxiety has been triggered. Unfortunately, after the break up I hv developed a phobia that I might have contracted hiv as part of the relationship.
We didn't hv intercourse but were physically intimate otherwise. I knew back then that I am being safe by avoiding intercourse and just restricting to kissing, hugging, nibbling /biting, rubbing genitals (with clothes on). However now I m having frequent anxiety attacks and think of getting tested which increases anxiety further.
My suggestion.
Detailed Answer:
Hello,
I have gone through your query in detail and understand your concern and worry towards your anxiety symptoms and fear of contracting HIV.
I would like to know is there any history of HIV in that man?
If not, there is no possibility of contracting HIV in any case.
So, due to your adjustment problem for break up and stress may prompt you to think in that way.
Anyway, there is nothing to worry about that. If you are still concerned, you can get HIV test done with out any fear, and which makes you feel comfortable.
I can suggest drugs like Escitalopram plus Clonazepam combination in the night to reduce your anxiety, and Etizolam in the morning, if you are more anxious in the mornings.
You can continue these drugs for 6-9 months for better response.
You can also follow deep breathing techniques, progressive muscle relaxation therapy to feel better.
If possible, its better to practice meditation.
Discuss with your doctor about these treatment modalities, and follow accordingly.
Hope this information would help you.
Thank you.


Unfortunately I don't know his past status.
And uncertainty is feeding my anxiety.
He was my boss in a large Singapore MNC and at that time I assumed there is no risk considering his good position in office n society. He is a permanent resident in Singapore and has 2 healthy kids so I assumed he must have been hiv negative when he got his Permanent Resident and had his 2nd kid in 2012 due to pregnancy screening for hiv. I applied all these logic before getting intimate in 2017and was very confident. But after break up my mind is clinging to this phobia.I ensure we didn't have intercourse.
My suggestion.
Detailed Answer:
Hello Madam,
Welcome back,
I have understood your current situation, and as far as your information is considered, there is obviously no possibility of having contracted HIV.
As you said, he got permanent residency in Singapore, and he was screened for it in 2012 itself.
So, there are very least possibility of having HIV in him.
In my opinion, there is nothing to worry and if you are so doubtful about this, you can get it screened to get rid of your fears.
I just wanted to inform you that if he has HIV, it will get contracted by even kissing, so better not to risk and rule out any possibility.
Hope this information would help you.
Thank you.


I hv done the tests as per your suggestion.
Attached the same.
Hiv is non reactive as well. They gave me a hard copy.
Looks like it's all clear now.
So, nothing to worry about it.
Detailed Answer:
Hello,
Welcome back,
I have gone through your reports, as all are within normal limits and HIV status is negative.
So, I'm very happy to hear this. Now its time to give new start to your life.
If you still feel anxious, you can start the above mentioned drugs with doctors prescription.
Hope this information would help you.
Thank you.


Hope now I can be confident in getting married and starting a new life! I wanted to ensure I don't infect my husband. I can confidently engage in physical relationship with my husband now without any confusion. Looks like it's all clear. Thanks so much.
You are most welcome.
Detailed Answer:
Hello Madam,
You are most welcome.
Its my pleasure to help you with my knowledge.
Anyway, I'm happy that you can give new start, and got relieved of all your fears and be comfortable with your upcoming new relation.
So, l wish you all the best.
Take care.
Dr. Soujanya, Psychiatrist

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