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I Am Unable To Concentrate In Calls And Online Meetings.

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Posted on Wed, 12 Aug 2020
Question: I am unable to concentrate in calls and online meetings. I get easily distracted, sometimes open and keep browsing social media sites during these calls. I am trynig meditation as well. While at times I am able to fully concentrate on the guided meditation, sometimes I don't even listen to waht is being said in it and my thoughts keep wandering. IT has been about 3 months since i started this guided meditation. Also, it takes at least 30 minutes for me to fall asleep after i hit the bed. I have so many thoughts one after the other, mostly imaginary situations - nothing related to what work I have tomorrow ,etc.

My distraction during calls have been happening for a few years now - after I moved from a job that required high attention to detail and overtime work to a very laid back job. This new job was so easy compared to the first one and required very less attention to detail that I started paying less and less attention in calls as there was less than 5% in these meetings that was relevant to me. Although I cannot be sure whether this can be a reason I lost my ability to concentrate, currently I am not able to concentrate on calls even if i want to and even if the subject is relevant to me - even if I am the only other person on the call.

Note: Online meetings are not new to me as I have been working from home and have online meetings for more than 7 years. It is not new because of the Covid situation
doctor
Answered by Dr. Psychologist K. V. Anand (1 hour later)
Brief Answer:
CBT and ACT should help you

Detailed Answer:
Dear friend. Thanks for the question. You are unable to concentrate on many things especially your calls. Your distraction during calls are happening for few years now. I understand.

Lack of concentration, negative thinking, thoughts always running in mind and even in background even when you are working, lack of focus on meetings and discussions etc are symptoms of Anxiety issue and mostly it has to be Obsessive Compulsive Disorder. Depression also can cause such symptoms.

When you are having these continuous intrusive thoughts, you cannot focus on meditation. Therefore trying meditation is useless.

Proper diagnosis is required for the OCD or depression so that perfect treatment can be given. Therefore you need to consult a psychiatrist in person.

For the time being, make sure that you write down all the thoughts are having in detail. Set aside at least 15 minutes at night to write down all the thoughts in a diary. Do this diary writing (Journalling) daily at least for three months. Journalling can help you channelize your thoughts.

Cognitive Behavior Therapy (CBT) and Acceptance and Commitment Therapy (ACT) are two therapy methods which are used successfully in this problem. You should practice these with medicines to get its positive effects.

1. Understand why intrusive thoughts bother you, on a deep level.
2. Attend to the intrusive thoughts; accept them and allow them in, then allow them to move on.
3. Don’t fear the thoughts; thoughts are just that—thoughts. Don’t let them become more than that.
4. Take intrusive thoughts less personally, and let go of your emotional reaction to them.
5. Stop changing your behaviors to align with your obsessions or compulsions; it won’t help in the long run.

You can contact me for further inquiry. Take care


Above answer was peer-reviewed by : Dr. Prasad
doctor
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Follow up: Dr. Psychologist K. V. Anand (13 hours later)
Thank you, doctor. I want to clarify that these thoughts are not negative and not on the same/similar topics. They are just random thoughts. I dont have depression or anxiety either. My current job is almost very stress-free and relaxed and so is my personal life. I had issues about until about 5 years back because of issues in my first marriage. Those got over when I got divorced. Now I have been married again for more than two years and I am living a happy and relatively stress-free life.

Let me provide some examples:
1. Like I mentioned, I may browse social networking sites while on calls, which takes away my attention.
2. I may look at other stuff on my laptop, such as books that I have downloaded or some other articles that are not related to work
3. However, even if i deliberately don't open sites or look at other stuff and say that I have to listen to this call, my mind wanders to something else. It nee dnot be negative thoughts or thoughts related to a spcific topic, like I said. It can be anything -thoughts that are good, not-so-good, or neutral.
4. While on bed waiting for sleep, I may not be thinking about stuff that makes me anxious but things like how some people behave, what is the next training/course I can take, will the new plants I planted grow well (i am not obsessed with this, it is my new hobby), etc. It may also be because how shouldI plan my days better.

And I am able to concentrate on what people tell me outside of work. In my personal conversations, I am able to pay attention EXCEPT for some simple things like people's names when I meet new people. In fact, my wife has told me that I remembr things that we discuss very well. My problem in personal situations (and official) are like remembering names because I don't pay attention when people say their names. I may remember where they are from, what is their favourite hobby, etc. Same in the case of movies that I watch. I don't remember the names of characters.


What kind of OCD can this be?
doctor
Answered by Dr. Psychologist K. V. Anand (1 hour later)
Brief Answer:
Journaling will help you

Detailed Answer:
Dear Friend. Exactly what I wanted to hear from you.

The random thoughts could happen due to many reasons. Main reasons are unconscious depressive, stressful, anxious activities. That is normal. Everyone will have such kind of thoughts if the person is idle mentally. Those who are really busy and engaged, these kind of thoughts will be suppressed because of the demand that the motivation comes out of the perceived importance of the task and the focus on it.

That is why I asked you to start a journal of the thoughts. You are doing good because those are negative thoughts, that they are not disturbing you. Write down all those random thoughts every day and soon they will stop coming.

But you also had another version of story. These random thoughts are disturbing your calls, meeting attention and focus. That is the trouble here. You yourself are confused.

Once you start writing the journal, you will have a clear pattern of thoughts and you will be easily able to identify those thoughts.

1. Understand why intrusive thoughts bother you, on a deep level.
2. Attend to the intrusive thoughts; accept them and allow them in, then allow them to move on.
3. Don’t fear the thoughts; thoughts are just that—thoughts. Don’t let them become more than that.
4. Take intrusive thoughts less personally, and let go of your emotional reaction to them.
5. Stop changing your behaviors to align with your obsessions or compulsions; it won’t help in the long run.

You can contact me for further inquiry. Take care

Above answer was peer-reviewed by : Dr. Vaishalee Punj
doctor
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Follow up: Dr. Psychologist K. V. Anand (2 days later)
Thank you.

You said "But you also had another version of story. These random thoughts are disturbing your calls, meeting attention and focus. That is the trouble here. You yourself are confused."

Just to clarify:

I do have thoughts disturbing me during my calls. But these are not "disturbing" or "negative" thoughts. By disturbing, what I meant is that they take my focus away from the call when I need to concentrate. These thoughts can be anything like what should I cook this weekend, what new things can I learn online, has someone replied to my post on facebook or whatsapp, when should I do my meditation today, I need o water the plants, I need to contact some of my old friends whom I got connected with recently after a long time through a whatsapp group etc. They are not things that are fearful. Earlier I used to have such thoughts - mainly my anger towards my first wife who hurt me, her family, etc.

I used to think have negative thoughts earlier when my marriage had ended. I used to keep thinking about how she made up stories and took money from me, how could she do something like this, how their family were all about money money money, etc. But such thoughts don't come anymore. I have forgotten, forgiven all that.

The only thing missing in my life now is a child but I do not keep thinking about it either. I hope it happens when it happens although I am 41.
doctor
Answered by Dr. Psychologist K. V. Anand (1 hour later)
Brief Answer:
Please start writing a journal

Detailed Answer:
Dear friend. Thanks for the follow up.

Random thoughts, negative thoughts, procrastination, disturbing thoughts etc do occur to everyone irrespective of their age. In fact these kind of thoughts are essential for mental strength. most of the negative thoughts of today strengthens the mind.

I am at least happey that you do not have much negative thoughts or rumination. So far so good.

Being busy and engaged is the best way to overcome the thoughts. But, why would you want to overcome the simple thoughts ? If they are distracting, learn to channelise it.

That is where journalling will help you. Please understand, I addressed your problems in the first answer itself. I wanted to clarify certain aspects to you. Please do not worry about the thoughts you have because, the more you worry about those, the more they disturb you.

Once you start writing the journal, you will have a clear pattern of thoughts and you will be easily able to identify those thoughts.

1. Understand why intrusive thoughts bother you, on a deep level.
2. Attend to the intrusive thoughts; accept them and allow them in, then allow them to move on.
3. Don’t fear the thoughts; thoughts are just that—thoughts. Don’t let them become more than that.
4. Take intrusive thoughts less personally, and let go of your emotional reaction to them.
5. Stop changing your behaviors to align with your obsessions or compulsions; it won’t help in the long run.

You can contact me for further inquiry. Take care
Note: For more detailed guidance, please consult an Internal Medicine Specialist, with your latest reports. Click here..

Above answer was peer-reviewed by : Dr. Kampana
doctor
Answered by
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Dr. Psychologist K. V. Anand

Psychologist

Practicing since :1993

Answered : 7324 Questions

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I Am Unable To Concentrate In Calls And Online Meetings.

Brief Answer: CBT and ACT should help you Detailed Answer: Dear friend. Thanks for the question. You are unable to concentrate on many things especially your calls. Your distraction during calls are happening for few years now. I understand. Lack of concentration, negative thinking, thoughts always running in mind and even in background even when you are working, lack of focus on meetings and discussions etc are symptoms of Anxiety issue and mostly it has to be Obsessive Compulsive Disorder. Depression also can cause such symptoms. When you are having these continuous intrusive thoughts, you cannot focus on meditation. Therefore trying meditation is useless. Proper diagnosis is required for the OCD or depression so that perfect treatment can be given. Therefore you need to consult a psychiatrist in person. For the time being, make sure that you write down all the thoughts are having in detail. Set aside at least 15 minutes at night to write down all the thoughts in a diary. Do this diary writing (Journalling) daily at least for three months. Journalling can help you channelize your thoughts. Cognitive Behavior Therapy (CBT) and Acceptance and Commitment Therapy (ACT) are two therapy methods which are used successfully in this problem. You should practice these with medicines to get its positive effects. 1. Understand why intrusive thoughts bother you, on a deep level. 2. Attend to the intrusive thoughts; accept them and allow them in, then allow them to move on. 3. Don’t fear the thoughts; thoughts are just that—thoughts. Don’t let them become more than that. 4. Take intrusive thoughts less personally, and let go of your emotional reaction to them. 5. Stop changing your behaviors to align with your obsessions or compulsions; it won’t help in the long run. You can contact me for further inquiry. Take care