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Suggest Remedy For Anger And Irritable Behaviour In An Elderly Person
Question: I have a 73 year old mother who is always angry - has intense dislike form several people, act inappropriately, makes faces, constant snyde comments, calls people names etc. its getting so bad that the grand children don't want to visit etc. Worries about EVERYTHING to extreme. (i.e. she comes to my house every time the maid is here because she is afraid she will steal things etc.) The slightest change in plans throws her into an absolute tizzy. Not sure how to handle.... but don't want her to live the rest of her life angry and afraid of everything.
Brief Answer:
Love and affection can change her
Detailed Answer:
Dear
Welcome to HCM
Thanks for the query
I went through your details. Your mother is 73. There is a saying "People at old age become children again". Their behavior will become as if they are children. There are several causes for that. First and prime being the insecurity feeling. Second is their age factor and diseases associated with their age.
Even though the details about your mother is not enough, I can sense the above two problems disturbing her. Insecurity feeling arises mainly due to her misinterpretation of people's behavior. For example, you may request her not to do hard work because of her health, but she takes it as if she has been told that she is incapable of doing hard work. Constant negative thinking under these circumstances takes its toll as insecurity.
Age factor and diseases associated with her age also ignite anxiety and worthlessness in them. They try to overcome these 'worthless' feeling by being more oral and active. You are experiencing this behavior now a days.
By watching your maid, she is actually "helping you" supervise the household, though it has a negative effect on your perception.
I sincerely think that you do not have much to do in this case. Her behavior may not change because she had crossed the age for counseling or advise. Best course of action is to understand her and work with her. Love, care and affection may calm her down.
As a last resort, you can take her to a psychiatrist who may prescribe some medicines to calm her down. Resort to this step only if you need it desperately. Medicines cripple her activities totally.
My sincere advise is to leave her in her way and love her and be affectionate. She is being a child.
God bless you.
Dr. K V Anand PhD
Love and affection can change her
Detailed Answer:
Dear
Welcome to HCM
Thanks for the query
I went through your details. Your mother is 73. There is a saying "People at old age become children again". Their behavior will become as if they are children. There are several causes for that. First and prime being the insecurity feeling. Second is their age factor and diseases associated with their age.
Even though the details about your mother is not enough, I can sense the above two problems disturbing her. Insecurity feeling arises mainly due to her misinterpretation of people's behavior. For example, you may request her not to do hard work because of her health, but she takes it as if she has been told that she is incapable of doing hard work. Constant negative thinking under these circumstances takes its toll as insecurity.
Age factor and diseases associated with her age also ignite anxiety and worthlessness in them. They try to overcome these 'worthless' feeling by being more oral and active. You are experiencing this behavior now a days.
By watching your maid, she is actually "helping you" supervise the household, though it has a negative effect on your perception.
I sincerely think that you do not have much to do in this case. Her behavior may not change because she had crossed the age for counseling or advise. Best course of action is to understand her and work with her. Love, care and affection may calm her down.
As a last resort, you can take her to a psychiatrist who may prescribe some medicines to calm her down. Resort to this step only if you need it desperately. Medicines cripple her activities totally.
My sincere advise is to leave her in her way and love her and be affectionate. She is being a child.
God bless you.
Dr. K V Anand PhD
Note: For further guidance on mental health, Click here.
Above answer was peer-reviewed by :
Dr. Vaishalee Punj
Answered by
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