Brief Answer:
you can get rid of performance anxiety alone or with help of partner/drug

Detailed Answer:
Hello,

Thanks for writing back.

You are getting morning erection. You are also aware that your problem is psychological and performance anxiety is the likely cause.

For good erection constant exciting erotic feelings must be present in mind. If your mind is diverted to something else apart from sex, erection is going to lose. Many times due to fatigue, stress, physical problem or excessive workload man cannot perform well in sex. In your case initial failure was likely due to long gap of inactive sexual life. This is not permanent failure but only occasional problem. When person becomes apprehensive about such occasional failure and constantly thinks about his ability do successful sex while he goes for sex his mind diverted from exciting/erotic feelings and penis loses erection. This anxiety might be responsible for failure of intercourse. This is called performance anxiety.
This is purely psychological problem, no physical/pathological problem at all.

To come out of this man must not think actively about maintaining erection while doing sex.
To get rid of performance anxiety help of partner is also an important aspect.
Whenever you go for sex, spare enough time in foreplay. You should not think actively about erection, your mind must be occupied with sexual/romantic feelings. During foreplay your partner should try to arouse you and note that your penis gets erection or not. When she feels that penis is sufficiently erect she herself should try to put erect penis in vagina gradually and you should continue your foreplay feelings without being conscious about erection. You must try to enjoy and only enjoy. Once penis is able to enter in vagina and strokes starts it is easy to complete successful sex.

If your partner is not aware about this situation you can do on your own. You just should try to do sex without being conscious about erection. Enjoy without thinking of your ability of maintaining erection and you will succeed or not.

Other option is low dose clonazepam or lorazepam before 2 hours of sex. This anti-anxiety medicine will reduce your apprehension and make you relax to have successful intercourse.

And another option is 5-PDE inhibitor group of drug like sildenafil or tadalfil as mentioned in previous discussions on this site. You can take it before 2 hours of sex for good erection. After 3-4 successful attempts you will have confidence and you can do without help of medicines later on.

Hope I have answered your query, I will be happy to help further.

Regards,
Dr.Chintan Solanki.

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