Question: Since my husband passed away about 6 months ago now, he was who helped me with any paperwork and finding words to finish sentences or when talking on the phone, etc. and now it's just me, I have plenty of friends, but no family here and of course, everyone works, so I'm having to do and handle things mostly on my own. For instance, the life insurance was sent back to me 3 times for not filling it out completely or right, so I still haven't received it and now I don't know if I can make all my bills this 1st of the month!!
But with all this stress, I've now lost more weight & am down to about 150, partially from not eating at all or not eating much (but I also have teeth that are going to fall out if too much pressure is applied, from the car accident that gave me the concussion, and so I plan to get my teeth fixed as soon as the life insurance is deposited), so I can't eat out in front of people & with my disabilities, I don't have a lot of energy to make something for me to eat after I've been online, doing paperwork, on the the phone, etc. and actually need a nap more than anything, and I always hurt in the mornings & have a low grade fever from the Lupus, so I can't do much of anything until my bones wake up and my mind now!
Now that that you know my background, .... and I forgot to mention, other times when I've lost weight, though I've never got up to 230lbs. before, but still, I've never lost it in my breasts like most women. I was always lucky, as my husband would say, I kept my C cup & lost the weight in all the right places, of course, when I was younger!! But now that I've turned 51 in March, my breast cup size, I don't know if it's necessarily gone down because my bras still fit, I just had to go down in the circumference, from a 44 down to between a 36 and a 40, depends who makes them! But lately, whenever I lean over to do laundry or pick up something off the floor or not even to lift something, just bending over to straighten the bed or something, but my left breast will pain me like a terrible pain!! As if I pulled a muscle in it or something and I didn't do anything of the sort!! The right side is fine. I check myself regularly and there's no lumps or anything different about my breast, but with my lack of diet and not getting all my vitamins and nutrients except from pill form, it's got me worried. My doctor had a mammogram referral set up for me to do but it was right around the time when I was dealing with still so much with my husband's death, so the timing wasn't good, so I couldn't make an appt. I suppose that's going to be your answer & the easiest call for you tonight, except having to read thru all my info, & dealing with my OCD of having to make sure you have all the info!! But can you at least also give me some ideas as to what it sounds like, & I don't care if it's gonna scare the normal person, I'm pretty used to it now & can handle what you tell me, knowing it's by no means, a diagnosis & all those other disclaimers!! I AM going to get the mammogram but I'd like to know your feelings as to what you & your colleagues think this pain could be, whenever I lean over & just my left breast hurts! With all the weight I've lost now, I think I'm actually down to about 150 now & I've always been the type of girl to wear a supportive bra, because I saw what happened to my sister's chest, who's a double AA cup and wore tank tops and tube tops in the 70's, and now, well they used to, look like a ping pong ball in a sock! So I didn't want mine doing that early, being much bigger!! I had a stress rest test done last year and the cardiologist said my heart was in excellent shape!! I don't know, it's gotten me nervous and that's the last thing I need is more things to make my nerves cause havoc on my system!! So if you can give me some ideas that cross your mind as to what could be causing this, I feel much better when I know, even if it is bad, I'd rather know. Cancer doesn't run in my family a lot, just a few relatives here and there. I asked my Dr. if he could do that test to see if I had the precursor gene for developing cancer or breast cancer, can't remember which it was, and he said he couldn't because of it being more dominant in women who's families it wasn't common in or maybe I'm saying that backwards, I'm not quite sure, but I think you understand.
Thanks for any help you can give me, I really, sincerely and truly appreciate the extra time you all put on here! Thank you!!

If you look at my medication list, I already take Pepcid on a daily basis, I don't drink soda at all and haven't for probably 5 years, and only drink as far as carbonated, a wine cooler or 2 , once or twice a week, due to the meds I'm on and just because I know I shouldn't with having all I have wrong with me, and all my meds, plus after watching my husband deteriorate his body and be so mean the last 3 years and not even realize it, thinking he was always fine as he bumped into walls and pictures dropped and broke, and as he ate and got food all over him and spilled his drink so many times; heaven forbid if we ever ran out of liquor!! He became a completely different person and I see my parents down south, retired, in their late 70's, my mom walks every day and my dad bike rides with a group of young guys about 30 miles every other day, but they enjoy their happy hour with their friends from all over the world in their ritzy trailer park!! But they don't eat all kinds of fast food (like my husband), and they eat 3 times a day, at least (he sometimes wouldn't eat at all certain days, just drink), and they spent time with friends on a regular basis, entertaining and doing things together (where our house had to be dark so he could sleep when he was home and he never cleaned, but he was a teacher, retired Special Forces, and a Head Football Coach while also belonging to a war veterans motorcycle club, so he made it impossible to be able to have any time to be able to take care of responsibilities at home, including me, yet he'd say, "I want to retire and do what your parents are doing!" And I knew that wouldn't happen the way he was not taking care of himself!! I have been losing weight, eating very healthy and I was raised to eat healthy so that was easy. I bought a very thick yoga mat to do stretching on and more as I get stronger, because I bought small colored neoprine 2, 3, & 5 lb. weights to work with. Since my husband died, I have been having to slowly clean out our house and shed by myself and I'm doing it, but it's inbetween the phone calls and emails and snail mail from soooooo many, to me AND to my late husband, regarding any of his debts or my debts and even though my name is off his cards and his is off mine, the credit companies, knowing he has passed, have still filed judgements against both of us and so my creditors are now lowering MY credit on my cards and because of this I'm incurring fees, which is costing me more! So if anything, the stress is really getting to me and I have had an appt. with a psychiatrist twice but have had to reschedule both because of other circumstances. I finally got word yesterday that his life insurance was approved but I don't know when it will be deposited, and I just deposited my last $200 from savings into my checking account but my account was in the red so it only brought my account back up to $48.00!! My parents nicely sent me $1,500 but it's an out of state check so by the time it clears, and is wired to my checking account, it'll cover my rent and last month's car payment, not my insurance and a bunch of other things that come out of my account in the 1st week of the month and I've already had most all of my creditors skip a payment and they can only do that once in a calendar year! So they have no compassion for people who have just lost their husband!!
It also just happens to be the very same time for Social Security to reevaluate me to see if I'm still disabled, so they need me to fill out more paperwork for them within 10 days or I could lose my benefits, and I only bring in $1,100 a month as it is!! So..... when it rains, it pours!! When I DO eat, I usually eat a protein bar and a cookie or raisins or applesauce. I also have a protein shake I make with cashew milk or almond milk and a greens shake mixed with o.j. and water that supplies me with 5 times the fruits and vegetables and they fill me up and help a lot, unti I can get my teeth fixed and eat regular food. But I even have to admit, I DO sometimes get so busy cleaning that I don't sit down or get up from the computer until I'm hurting so bad I have to, and realize I haven't eaten in 12 hours or something!! And sometimes I'll just grab a cookie because it's easier and tastes good! But I do have cans of tuna fish and green beans and many other vegetables that I could very easily open or frozen that I could microwave, but it all seems like too much work and I'm so exhausted after what I've done, which is common which is common with me!! I tend to overdo it a lot and then I can't do just about anything else!! I have noticed though, the pain on my left breast side is now not just when I bend over, it's getting to be where it's an almost all the time ache or pain. It's not in the lung area I don't think because it doesn't seem to hurt any more or less when I breathe in or out! The pain IS more noticeable when I lean over and perhaps it's right before bed, so I'm not wearing a bra (until now!); I go to lean over to pick up something and Oh my goodness, I have to grab my breast and hold it in place, because it seems like the pain is so prominent unless I can offer some support with my hand when leaning over. It doesn't completely alleviate the pain but it helps. What helps is just not bending over at all!! Now for the last 3 days and nights, I've been wearing a sports bra but like I said before, now it's gone to being an ongoing dull ache just about all the time!! All this time I've been sitting here typing this all out to you (I'm sorry for going on & on!!), it has been aching, but only on the left side. Other mammograms I've had before have all come back fine and the self breast exam I've kept doing, which I will try with my palm and see if there's a difference, but I haven't found any lumps! I forgot to call my doctor to make an appt. this week & get a referral for a mammogram but I will call tomorrow and get that scheduled right away! Please let me know if you have any other ideas that come to mind.
Thanks again, so so much!!