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Suggest Treatment For Violent Anger And Aggressive Behavior In A Teenager

Posted on Wed, 16 Sep 2015

Question: How can we manage violent anger of our 18 years old son. Till 2014 he was very sincere and model student of the school. After schooling he passed professional Entrance exam with very good position. But during preparation of main examination irritation and anger became part of his nature. He refused to appear in exam in May 2015. Now he is in frustration blaming our family atmosphere for all this and becoming violent to mother. Very kind to his 10 year old sister. He never hurt to his sister. Always try to hurt mother and tell me not to come in between. He ask for coaching at home. Don't want to go outside. Tell that either you or someone have created my bad image in the public and everyone look at him with different angle. kindly advise how to treat him and how to motivate him again to appear in exam. I, personally against any anti-depression medicine as I advised that these medicines become habit and may also affect memory power adversely

Answered by Dr. Shubham Mehta (34 minutes later)

Brief Answer:
anger management tips.

Detailed Answer:
Hello
Welcome to HCM.
I can understand your concerns for your son.

He has developed a blaming attitude for his anger and frustration. His anger is mostly targeted towards his mother.

In such cases, where the adolescents have targeted anger and develops a blaming attitude out frustration is usually due to inferiority feelings or kind of depression.

I have some suggestions which will help you to manage his anger outbursts:

1. Develop a friendly and trustworthy relation with him.

2. Help him recognizing the irrational reasons for getting angry. Make him understand the difference between an annoyance and hurting someone.

3. Teach him ways to control anger like taking a deep breath, stepping away from the situation and asking yourself “Why am I really mad?”.

4. Try to make him identify triggers for anger.

Say for e.g. If there are certain things that
he dislikes abiut his mother, he should try to avoid those things.

5. Help him plan his time wisely. One of the most common anger stressors is poor time management.
When you’re in a rush and something slows you down even more you are very likely to react in anger. The simplest way to avoid this is to exercise effective time management.

6. Engaging in outdoor games can help to destress him.

7. Give him enough space so that he talks it out.

I would also suggest you to consult your local psychiatrist for a further detailed evaluation.
Medicines are not given in every case and antidepressants are not habit forming.
If needed, the drugs will do more good then harm.

Hope this helps.
Thanks.

Above answer was peer-reviewed by : Dr. Chakravarthy Mazumdar

Follow up: Dr. Shubham Mehta (47 hours later)

Thanks Sir. Sorry, But most of the suggestions given by you are not applicable in the case as I already have told that he don't like to go outside suggestion no. 6 and 7 is not applicable and all other suggestions we already have tried but he do not believe on us or any one. If we engage any friends or relatives to talk with him he blames that all discussions were planned by you and the person is supporting the things you want. Reason for getting angry, according to him, irritating nature of his mother in the past and family atmosphere because of that he could not prepare for the exam. Now a days he goes to bed around 4 a.m. and get up in afternoon around 3 pm. Most of the time he waste in watching TV. He avoid to eat food prepared by his mother with reason that food prepared in anger by her is hrmful for him.

Answered by Dr. Shubham Mehta (18 hours later)

Brief Answer:
needs to be evaluated in detail.

Detailed Answer:
Hi again.
Sorry for the late response.

As he is talking of planning and plotting against him and has strong suspiciousness for mother that he does not eats food made by her, then I would suggest you to consult your nearest psychiatrist/psychologist for detailed evaluation.

The reason I say so is, there are some projective tests like 'rorschach test' or 'sentence completion test' which help to determine the inner conflicts of a person.

Once identified, he can be managed accordingly a trained professional personally. He needs to be made understood the irrationality of his anger.

Other than this, if the suspiciousness is creeping in significantly, he needs to be evaluated for paranoia. A detailed face to face interview, observing his facial expression, posture and attitude will greatly help in understanding his condition.

The management will thus be decided accordingly.

If feasible for you, kindly keep me updated about what does his doctor suggests.

I wish good health for your son.

Thanks.

Note: For further guidance on mental health, Click here.

Above answer was peer-reviewed by : Dr. Chakravarthy Mazumdar