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What Are The Health Risks Of Total Sexual Abstinence Both From Intercourse And Masturbation?
Question: What are the health risks of total sexual abstinence both from intercourse and masturbation?
Brief Answer:
Information
Detailed Answer:
Hello,
There are no major health risks from total sexual abstinence, and there are celibate people who have spent their lives this way without ill harm.
Hope I have answered your query. Let me know if I can assist you further.
Regards,
Dr. Bonnie Berger-Durnbaugh, General & Family Physician
Information
Detailed Answer:
Hello,
There are no major health risks from total sexual abstinence, and there are celibate people who have spent their lives this way without ill harm.
Hope I have answered your query. Let me know if I can assist you further.
Regards,
Dr. Bonnie Berger-Durnbaugh, General & Family Physician
Above answer was peer-reviewed by :
Dr. Chakravarthy Mazumdar
What can be done to eliminate or at least diminish same sex attraction?
Brief Answer:
Thoughts on this
Detailed Answer:
Hi,
We don't really know what causes homosexuality, but there is a fair amount of evidence that it is something that a person is born with.
Sexual attraction, whether heterosexual or homosexual, is normal. Years ago in the DSM manual that psychiatrists use as guidelines for mental illness, homosexuality was listed but has been removed as a pathology for many decades.
Is your reason for wanting to stem homosexual urges is due to religion? It is considered wrong by various religions but often is subject to interpretation. While the New Testament talks about it being wrong, there are many Christians who have interpreted the passage differently. And some interpret it as feel it as not being as important of a passage relative to the general themes. Certainly, there are many things we ignore or interpret based on the times they were written.
If sexual urges are in some way harmful such as for sex with children or animals, then cognitive behavioral therapy may help.
If sexual thoughts are obsessive and excessive, interfering with daily living, such as feeling the need to masturbate multiple times per day, treatment with medications that are used for OCD can help.
But from a medical standpoint, homosexuality in itself is not pathological, and there really is no treatment or behavior modification that can change that orientation.
Hope I have answered your query. Let me know if I can assist you further.
Regards,
Dr. Bonnie Berger-Durnbaugh, General & Family Physician
Thoughts on this
Detailed Answer:
Hi,
We don't really know what causes homosexuality, but there is a fair amount of evidence that it is something that a person is born with.
Sexual attraction, whether heterosexual or homosexual, is normal. Years ago in the DSM manual that psychiatrists use as guidelines for mental illness, homosexuality was listed but has been removed as a pathology for many decades.
Is your reason for wanting to stem homosexual urges is due to religion? It is considered wrong by various religions but often is subject to interpretation. While the New Testament talks about it being wrong, there are many Christians who have interpreted the passage differently. And some interpret it as feel it as not being as important of a passage relative to the general themes. Certainly, there are many things we ignore or interpret based on the times they were written.
If sexual urges are in some way harmful such as for sex with children or animals, then cognitive behavioral therapy may help.
If sexual thoughts are obsessive and excessive, interfering with daily living, such as feeling the need to masturbate multiple times per day, treatment with medications that are used for OCD can help.
But from a medical standpoint, homosexuality in itself is not pathological, and there really is no treatment or behavior modification that can change that orientation.
Hope I have answered your query. Let me know if I can assist you further.
Regards,
Dr. Bonnie Berger-Durnbaugh, General & Family Physician
Above answer was peer-reviewed by :
Dr. Chakravarthy Mazumdar
I grew up in a tradition that abhors same sex behaviors. I have been terrified of going to hell since the age of 7. I now belong to a tradition that does same sex weddings. They say the bible is not so much an instruction manual as a love story and that it should not be cherry-picked so as to justify one's own biases but rather taken as a whole; that it's message is of grace, hope, and unconditional, boundless love. That doesn't help me. I consider same sex desires the primary source of my self loathing and depression. I want to dismiss the religious trappings and approach this with secular science. I propose to abstain from masturbation, fantasy, and pornography for a while--two, three, maybe six months, and see what happens. I plan to spend time with males whose company I enjoy but Who I find unattractive. And to avoid those that I find attractive. And even to avoid looking at myself nude in the mirror. I think I might be less unhappy behaving and thinking as an asexual. I may be exaggerating but I have mostly disappointment, grief, and regret from my sexual experiences with both men and women. I might learn something. I might find energy to do other things. I might manage my symptoms better (PTSD--Desert Storm, panic disorder, bipolar). I might spend less time in the abysmal darkness of my depressive cycle, and in the frantic chaos of my manic cycle and maybe spend a little more time in the steady XXXXXXX territory. Some XXXXXXX is found there. Or the experiment could make it worse or make no difference at all. We'll see. I would like to know if you have had or heard of anyone who has tried something like this. Incidentally I am on Lamotrigine, Clonidine, Losartan, Bupropion, Zantac, Lorazepam, all courtesy of the VA. OTC 81mg aspirin, vitamin D, joint supplement, and monthly vitamin B shots from PA at employee clinic. So to be clear about the question: Have you ever heard of someone who tried this? If so, do you know anything about the outcome? Would you be interested in a report on my results? Thank you for being there.
I read the article you suggested before I wrote to you. But I read it again.
I read the article you suggested before I wrote to you. But I read it again.
Brief Answer:
Thoughts on this
Detailed Answer:
Hello,
I personally agree more with the ideas of the current tradition you describe, and indeed the Bible says God is love. Says it in many ways. So I am not one to get into judgement and condemnation (which is also discussed in the Bible) on homosexuality which is only discussed briefly and subject to interpretation. Other religions have at their core similar themes of love and acceptance too. But I do understand how what we learned so strongly as young children is still in us as adults and something that we wrestle with.
You can try your experiment to see how it works for you, but please don't get angry with yourself if it doesn't work out. Some people are more sexual than others - for some people being asexual is natural and easy, for others, quite difficult.
So in thinking about your question of whether I've heard of people who have tried this: As a physician I had the members of a convent in my practice, and all of the nuns appeared to be successfully celibate although I can't attest to what their thoughts or urges might have been. I have a friend, now 79 years old, who, 20-30 yrs ago chose to be celibate and chaste for spiritual practices and with some initial difficulty, has succeeded. He is heterosexual, but otherwise, is similar in that he had urges but chose to commit to celibacy. His advice would be that there has to be substitution for when those urges or thoughts come up.
I am sorry you have to deal with bipolar disorder and hope that you have a good psychiatrist who has a lot of experience specifically with bipolar, because as you know, getting the medications just right is important.
If you decide to try your experiment, I suggest preparing ahead of time with activity substitutions, and also to read up on or watch videos on mindfulness. You may already have knowledge in this area. The reason I am suggesting this is because if you have been a sexual being throughout your adult life (with partners or self), sexual urges/thoughts will come up spontaneously and it will take practice to recognize that that is happening, identify the thought, and then gently let the thought go and redirect your thoughts to something else. One thing you can try (which is sometimes suggested for panic attacks) is:
In this moment...
What are 5 things you can see,
What are 4 things you can touch,
What are 3 things you can hear,
What are 2 things you can smell,
What is 1 thing you can taste?
There are other things you can choose to do to derail your thinking that may feel appropriate to you, but I recommend planning ahead, whatever method or thought substitution you choose.
When people are trying to recover from addiction or habits, taking one day at a time is often best. Restart each day.
I'm wondering if there might be a support group of people who are by nature homosexual but have chosen celibacy? Because with any behavior change, getting social support can be helpful. I'm not sure where you would find a group like this - maybe thru the Catholic church in your area or googling key words and your geographical area and see what comes up.
I would be happy to hear how you are doing. I appreciate hearing how people are doing and want to provide support if I can. I just want to give you a FYI that for every 4 email exchanges, the company charges the patient an additional fee (less than the original I think - I don't know how much it is and I don't have control over it); and for every email from the patient, even just to say hi, the doctor is required to respond.
So, I wish you well in your experiment if you choose to do it, and will provide what information and support I can.
Hope I have answered your query. Let me know if I can assist you further.
Regards,
Dr. Bonnie Berger-Durnbaugh
General & Family Physician
Thoughts on this
Detailed Answer:
Hello,
I personally agree more with the ideas of the current tradition you describe, and indeed the Bible says God is love. Says it in many ways. So I am not one to get into judgement and condemnation (which is also discussed in the Bible) on homosexuality which is only discussed briefly and subject to interpretation. Other religions have at their core similar themes of love and acceptance too. But I do understand how what we learned so strongly as young children is still in us as adults and something that we wrestle with.
You can try your experiment to see how it works for you, but please don't get angry with yourself if it doesn't work out. Some people are more sexual than others - for some people being asexual is natural and easy, for others, quite difficult.
So in thinking about your question of whether I've heard of people who have tried this: As a physician I had the members of a convent in my practice, and all of the nuns appeared to be successfully celibate although I can't attest to what their thoughts or urges might have been. I have a friend, now 79 years old, who, 20-30 yrs ago chose to be celibate and chaste for spiritual practices and with some initial difficulty, has succeeded. He is heterosexual, but otherwise, is similar in that he had urges but chose to commit to celibacy. His advice would be that there has to be substitution for when those urges or thoughts come up.
I am sorry you have to deal with bipolar disorder and hope that you have a good psychiatrist who has a lot of experience specifically with bipolar, because as you know, getting the medications just right is important.
If you decide to try your experiment, I suggest preparing ahead of time with activity substitutions, and also to read up on or watch videos on mindfulness. You may already have knowledge in this area. The reason I am suggesting this is because if you have been a sexual being throughout your adult life (with partners or self), sexual urges/thoughts will come up spontaneously and it will take practice to recognize that that is happening, identify the thought, and then gently let the thought go and redirect your thoughts to something else. One thing you can try (which is sometimes suggested for panic attacks) is:
In this moment...
What are 5 things you can see,
What are 4 things you can touch,
What are 3 things you can hear,
What are 2 things you can smell,
What is 1 thing you can taste?
There are other things you can choose to do to derail your thinking that may feel appropriate to you, but I recommend planning ahead, whatever method or thought substitution you choose.
When people are trying to recover from addiction or habits, taking one day at a time is often best. Restart each day.
I'm wondering if there might be a support group of people who are by nature homosexual but have chosen celibacy? Because with any behavior change, getting social support can be helpful. I'm not sure where you would find a group like this - maybe thru the Catholic church in your area or googling key words and your geographical area and see what comes up.
I would be happy to hear how you are doing. I appreciate hearing how people are doing and want to provide support if I can. I just want to give you a FYI that for every 4 email exchanges, the company charges the patient an additional fee (less than the original I think - I don't know how much it is and I don't have control over it); and for every email from the patient, even just to say hi, the doctor is required to respond.
So, I wish you well in your experiment if you choose to do it, and will provide what information and support I can.
Hope I have answered your query. Let me know if I can assist you further.
Regards,
Dr. Bonnie Berger-Durnbaugh
General & Family Physician
Above answer was peer-reviewed by :
Dr. Chakravarthy Mazumdar
been a few days, lost count, evidently taking one day at a time. 54321 good, use next episode of sudden terror or creeping dread. your panic patients call it that? title change--defined period of abstinence--not pursuing asexuality. rising from bipolar downcycle abyss without masturbation as opiate. different. feels good. not failure no anger if give in to occasional "pressure release"-- the boys feel heavy and a little achy but nothing I can't handle. to "derail" yes he is pretty but he has the same troubles as all the rest of us. don't objectify him even in your mind. few days abstinent noticeable difference. not tossing off, no porn, no fantasies--freedom to relax, to get to know self. seems like those behaviors distract from more important things. seems like they are topical anesthetic and bandaid on wound that requires debriding. sex with women: give her an orgasm, a cuddle, a baby--work, chore, nothing in it for me. with men--I really want this---then--why am I doing this? all sex experience--only embarrassment, regret, sorrow, disappointment, guilt, shame, grief. abstinence so far--no trouble sleeping or concentrating, libido still there, morning wood came back. hetero handshake, hug from man I know loves me beats sack time with a user, want bromance, manhood affirmation from other men, to be
'one of the boys"didn't get that growing up, got a little bit in the military. touch=starved but afraid to touch-fear of misinterpretation of intent, fear of others expectations, fear of losing boundaries. fear of being controlled by other. google vet center--recommend to your combat and military sexual trauma veterans. I get counseling there. this venue for thinking out loud and having you really listen is gratifying--unlike the rush through with the VA pill pusher shrink. thanks. there's the gist. I hopt it goes thrub this time. comments invited.
'one of the boys"didn't get that growing up, got a little bit in the military. touch=starved but afraid to touch-fear of misinterpretation of intent, fear of others expectations, fear of losing boundaries. fear of being controlled by other. google vet center--recommend to your combat and military sexual trauma veterans. I get counseling there. this venue for thinking out loud and having you really listen is gratifying--unlike the rush through with the VA pill pusher shrink. thanks. there's the gist. I hopt it goes thrub this time. comments invited.
Brief Answer:
Glad to hear the update
Detailed Answer:
Hello,
It sounds like so far your attempts are going well and having some positive effects.
Sounds like your preplanned ideas for how to "derail" your urges or thoughts is a good one - to see the reality rather than romanticize/objectify another person.
I'm glad to hear the good news so far.
Hope I have answered your query.
Regards,
Dr. Bonnie Berger-Durnbaugh
General & Family Physician
Glad to hear the update
Detailed Answer:
Hello,
It sounds like so far your attempts are going well and having some positive effects.
Sounds like your preplanned ideas for how to "derail" your urges or thoughts is a good one - to see the reality rather than romanticize/objectify another person.
I'm glad to hear the good news so far.
Hope I have answered your query.
Regards,
Dr. Bonnie Berger-Durnbaugh
General & Family Physician
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Above answer was peer-reviewed by :
Dr. Chakravarthy Mazumdar
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