How Can Severe Depression And Anxiety Be Treated?

I witnessed my 18 month old daughter aspirate on food. She went limp. It took ambulance 18 minutes to get to our house. She never regained consciousness and died in my arms the next morning. This was 1993. I suffered severe depression....guilt ridden......nightmares on a regular basis....severe anxiety at the sound of sirens...contemplated suicide every day. I went to church and counseling. My husband was not interested in either. He took a leave of absence from work for 3 months. He went fishing every day...left me alone at home. I was desperate to have another child. We finally did get pregnant with twins....I was hypervigilant. The twins were born in 1996. Things were good. Fast forward...2007, my mom died unexpectedly.....I was main support for my father. My husband s sister died 1 month before my mom did...then 3 weeks later, her daughter committed suicide...shot herself in the head. In 2014 my husband was in a car accident...8 days in a coma for 8 days...we withdrew life support. Next my father died....less than a year after. Next, my older sister died unexpectedly after years of fentanyl and prescription drugs. All these deaths were back to back. The death of my sister recently has thrown me into back in to severe depression and anxiety...who s going to die next?? Don t want to get out of bed.