Welcome to health care magic!
I have read and understand your problem and found that you have high emotional reactions which are usually not under your control. These are usually more than required at that moment or for that situation. It also looks that you do later feel guilt about the same but unable to control it.
You need to tell me that what is your general overall mood and what is the duration of these ups and downs. Your condition can be due to some personality factors in which person has extreme positive and extreme negative moods but nothing in "grey" zone. They also have difficulty in making long term relationships. The condition is usually from a long duration.
It can also be due to a condition called "bipolar disorder" in which mood fluctuates between very low to very high with or without any external event. However, usually the duration of either mood change lasts for weeks or months.
I have seen such cases and from my experience I can say that it can be aggravated due to your current conditions: 1. not in studies actively; 2. No work to keep you busy; 3. have limited friend circle who are free to accompany you.
If I were in your place I would -
1. visit a
psychiatrist and talk about my condition in detail
2. keep myself busy with some kind of job, even part-time would help
3. go for walks, do work-outs, as it would keep me in better physical and mental health
4. talk to some one close regarding my feelings openly
Hope this answer helps you, please feel free to ask further if you need.
Dr. Manisha Gopal