About 2 years ago I noticed I became quite sad , my mood deteriorated quickly, i was harming myself many times a day and writing suicide notes, things got out of hand and eventually my parents found out (We didn t talk much about it). Soon after things got okay for a little while then went back down again, August this year I got a job and I couldn t of been happier. Its been a month and now I feel worse than ever, I m constantly thinking negatively. I m so wrapped up in what everyone thinks. This job is with children and they re all so great, I wouldn t want this to get in the way. I m a very private person and I can t bring myself to talk to a doctor face to face ( I have tried, it didn t go well and I ended up telling the counsellor I was refereed to that everything was fine), I just want to understand what is happening with out having to go see a doctor :/ can you help me please!!