What Causes Depression Along With Anxiety, Insomnia And Mania?

Hi , I am shuresh , 24 , from Tamilnadu , India . I have some problems mentally , but I dunno what my illness is . I have these problems for past 8 years . My mood swings very often . sometimes I feel happy with no reason , sometimes sad , depressed , stressed with no reason and it keeps changing . sometimes i feel like am the greatest person , sometimes as the biggest loser . sometimes I laughing or cry with no control . sometimes I blabber to myself with different words , different language , for which meaning I don t know . sometimes I feel Superior , sometimes inferior . I have suicidal or murder thoughts very often . I attempted suicide two years before , was hospitalized for a month. I can t concentrate on a particular thing . My interest keeps on changing from one thing to another or sometimes I feel like I can do everything , sometimes I feel like I cant do anything . when I talk to someone I keep changing the topic or talk irrelevant , get angry , upset with them with no reason , then I shout at them . I cant feel freshness in my mind or in body after sleep and bath . always i feel like messy . I forget things often . When I don t know the meaning for a word while reading book or article , I used to search the meaning in google , but I forget the word the next second before I open the browser and thinking why I open the browser . Most of the time I forget what topic I am talking . I cant understand the lines whether it is tamil(my mother tongue) , english (second language) even its a simple statement , so I have to read it again and again or ask the person to say it again and again , sometimes I can t understand even if I read it many times , I only feel angry then I quit . Now sometimes I cant get the words to talk , sometimes even I struggle to tell the name of my family members . Most of the time i act like a weird . I forget the language vocabulary , grammar and try hard to remember. But I was one of the toppers in my school days , mostly I ranked in top three in academic , sports , extra curriculum. I forget the complex path in which I travel , street name . I hesitate to go out or mingle with others , not because I am shy person but I always feel like everyone is watching me or i feel like i look messy , ugly that no one will like me . I am getting more emotional day by day but sometimes I feel like I dont care if the world ends now . I am not able to sleep peacefully . Always I feel like I have multiple layers of dream very fast whether it s day or night . Always I feel like having some weight inside my head . now-a-days I have irritation , pain around my chest , lungs , right side head , behind eyes . I am hating everyone , myself and feel like no one likes me and longing for love . I can t control my sexual thoughts . I have sexual thoughts 24*7 even if i don t like . My likes in sex getting kinkier everyday . I dunno why i always like wild sex . I never had satisfied in sex , always I feel like need more even after having sex multiple times in a day . Even if not sleep enough , after heavy physical work I dont feel tired most of times , I only have heavy breath . Always my mind is thinking multiple things at a time , even i don t get what am thinking most of the times . I lose interest within minutes . I read or watch movie interestingly but lose interest in some minutes and move to next film . I never watch a film at a go . I dunno what s happening in me . Most of the time I am thinking about things that won t happen like am time travelling , a demon is inside me , angle flying over me . Take everything more person even if am not involve in that moment or scenes in films , articles that i read . I fear foe everything . Fear to drive (I cant judge the distance to the nearby vehicle , always remember the horrible accidents that i saw or read while try to drive , sometime I forget that am driving and all of sudden i remember , confused and act like i just forget to drive), to mingle with people , meet people in higher posts , rich , go into dark(sometime I feel like I the demon that ghost afraid and walk in dark but in just some seconds I frighten and run in search for light ). Even a sudden,low frequency sound or noise around me triggered my fear and feel like i have heart attack. I can t fight with my mind all day . I hate my life , everything . I don t want to live like this . I know ,I may have some serious issue but I dunno why my mind not letting me to consult a specialist . Please tell me what problem I have or eveyone I like this ?