Please read full post: I personally have tons of violent fantasies, but I also have the urge to tried to live out my violent fantasies too, and they are very strong. I literally tried choking my brother twice, before realizing what I was doing(which is why I am now more careful around him). I have always had violent urges, and the older I get, the more aggressive, hostile, and violent I become, and the harder I have to work to hold back my urges. I also have weird urges to inflict pain on myself too, such as the urges to pull out my eyeballs, rip out my nails, rip it my hair, pull out my teeth, stab my eyes with something sharp, stab myself in the stomach, cut my eye lids, cut my cheeks, and much more. Both my violent fantasies, and my fantasies of inflicting pain on myself can be sexual at times, but usually are not. I am also noticing that my empathy levels have dropped, and that I have been way less social than I usually am. I find that I go through episodes of either feeling no emotions and desires to do anything, or I feel depressed/ angry. I also like seeing people in pain, but I have always been that way for some reason. I also have a fear of people, especially the government and strangers, listening to my thoughts and stalking me. There have been many times when I avoid doing or thinking of certain things to keep them from laughing at me, or from using that information to black mail me. I am also scared of there being a lunatic under my bed, ready to grab me, and of people in general trying to kill, stalk, or hurt me. I am a pretty paranoid person. I even have a fear of flushing the toilet late at night because I think that a murderer or bugler might hear me(I have had this fear since I was only 3 years old). What do you think? Is this normal, am I overreacting?