My sex drive always seems to die as my relationships progress. I have always struggled with low self esteem but at the beginning of my relationship my boyfriend and I were having sex daily, multiple times a day. We have been together 2 years now and we will have sex about once a week. He is not happy with this at all and frankly neither am I and he often becomes frustrated when I reject him, which I understand. I love him and want our future together but the thought of engaging in sex makes me nervous and stressed and overwhelmed. I also often times just feel dirty thinking about sex or masterbation. I do not know if this is due to past experiences or my current relationship, we argue over small things at times and that makes me question our relationship- I ask myself what if I m giving myself to the wrong person, what if he is not the one? But I really think and hope that he is. But these feelings overwhelm me. The same thing happened in my last relationship of 2 years until we ultimately stopped having sex all together. Many of the men I ve slept with were men who cheated on me or used me for sexual purposes. I don t know if this would have any impact, but when I was a child classmate of mine would ask me to perform sexual favors on her and she would touch me as well. I have always felt guilt for this but was too shy back then to say no. I sometimes wonder if a combination of all of these things has led me to not think of sex as a beautiful thing but rather as something wrong and bad that should be hidden and something I will regret. Also, my boyfriend makes me feel more beautiful than I ever have but I still feel self conscious during sex, I am very skinny but do not have any muscle tone and do not exercise much. I am also always paranoid about body hair, the size of my breasts, etc. As you can see, I have so many concerns going on that I don t know where to start, I don t want another failed relationship but I don t know where else to turn for help.