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Dr. Andrew Rynne
MD
Dr. Andrew Rynne

Family Physician

Exp 50 years

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Why Am I Skipping Social Gathering All The Time?

I love making plans i am very social yet every time i always cancel like an hour or so before i go out. then i get upset i didn't go out. I dont know why i dont go out i just cant get myself to do it and its just hard that everyone just thinks i cancel for the hell of it but i cant explain it to anyone
Thu, 17 Jul 2014
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Psychiatrist,  's  Response
Hi, thanks for the query. This tendency of skipping things at the last moment due to some ''second thought/second guess/self doubts'' etc. is termed as ambivalence. I am sure apart from social gatherings, there might be other things also in your life when you get these doubts or second thoughts. Generally speaking, taking a second guess or ambivalence is NOT harmful per se until it causes significant distress or dysfunction. Hence a simple advice is whenever you do get such second thoughts about cancelling pre-planned events, make a 2 column chart & write down points in favor & points against abrupt cancellation to help you make a clear decision. You can get back to me if needed. Good Luck
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Why Am I Skipping Social Gathering All The Time?

Hi, thanks for the query. This tendency of skipping things at the last moment due to some second thought/second guess/self doubts etc. is termed as ambivalence. I am sure apart from social gatherings, there might be other things also in your life when you get these doubts or second thoughts. Generally speaking, taking a second guess or ambivalence is NOT harmful per se until it causes significant distress or dysfunction. Hence a simple advice is whenever you do get such second thoughts about cancelling pre-planned events, make a 2 column chart & write down points in favor & points against abrupt cancellation to help you make a clear decision. You can get back to me if needed. Good Luck