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Suggest Treatment For Symptoms Of Adjustment Disorder
Question: Hi,
I would like to say few detailed details abt me so that i think it would be easy to understand my problem.
I am 27 yrs old. Very senstive and short tempered girl. I had few problems related to my family about my marriage and related to work and still i hav. So usually i used to discuss all this problems with a very close friend.
I am very reserved type and i dont hav much friends except 2 close friends. One friend is married and she is very busy.
Other friend is one whom i said used to share everything to him. And i used fight more with him sometimes as he dont care and call me. I ll be person always who used to call him. He used to speaks happily with other friends in room but to me he wont speak happily n gets irritated. Sometimes he wont listen wat i am saying he will busy in watsapp or facebook. Everytime i fight and after sometime he ll feel guilty n ask sorry and we will be normal.
A year back he started to speak sometimes abt sex and i felt awkard.
But since he himself tries and speaks with me even i used to keep quite atleast he speaks to me something.
Once on friendship day, i booked tickets and want to meet him badly. From a month, i was planning wat to give him gift and took everything n went to meet him.
Asusual he didnt bring anything to me and i knew he wont. I myself brought extra friendship band and asked to tie me. Like this he came on my birthday and i went to meet him for one last time as he was going to get engage. We stayed together in hotel.
I had requested him to takecare of me for somedays as i will be lonely and usually i will not sleep at night due to which i had been to psycharists twice for sleeping pills.
Now he is got engaged. I am very happy for him but yet dono a kind of feeling disturbing me. Feels lonely like he too left me and gone.
Even after request he forgets me. Day and night he speak with tat girl but forgets tat he have a friend.
And i am fighting eveyday very badly and making him upset. The girl whom he marries is little orthodox. I am scared of this as well whether she ll allow our friendship. Its of 7 yrs friendship even though we fight but get back from fight very soon.
I had discussed this with him but he says give time but i am scared to give time. As times goes he may forget me bcoz all of sudden he stopped talking with me after engagement. Now after my fight he is chatting.
I feel very bad and awkard now that i am begging my friend to be with me everyday or i fight and make him upset.
I want him to be happy but i dono how to forget him. My health n mind getting worse day by day bcoz i am thinking alot of this. I could stop thinking even i sleep it comes as dreams n i started to scream in night n started to use avil sometimes took overdosage to sleep.
I tried mediation but couldnt concentrate in that. I badly feel like i want my friend back as he was before but tats not possible bcoz he engaged n going to get marry in 2 months.
Now i dono how to come out if this. I hate to be in pg. i just ran from came to home and planned to travel daily(app 6 hrs journey to n fro).
Thaught staying with family will not give lonely. But still i feel lonely n not able to sleep. Even today i fought with him tat he is not giving me time but he is not able to do it bcoz of work n ofcourse he should give time to her.
But i cant convince my mind. And i keep crying. Somebody help me how can i forget him?? I want him to be happy and even i should be happy.
But i get thaughts to die so that all problems ll be solved.
I would like to say few detailed details abt me so that i think it would be easy to understand my problem.
I am 27 yrs old. Very senstive and short tempered girl. I had few problems related to my family about my marriage and related to work and still i hav. So usually i used to discuss all this problems with a very close friend.
I am very reserved type and i dont hav much friends except 2 close friends. One friend is married and she is very busy.
Other friend is one whom i said used to share everything to him. And i used fight more with him sometimes as he dont care and call me. I ll be person always who used to call him. He used to speaks happily with other friends in room but to me he wont speak happily n gets irritated. Sometimes he wont listen wat i am saying he will busy in watsapp or facebook. Everytime i fight and after sometime he ll feel guilty n ask sorry and we will be normal.
A year back he started to speak sometimes abt sex and i felt awkard.
But since he himself tries and speaks with me even i used to keep quite atleast he speaks to me something.
Once on friendship day, i booked tickets and want to meet him badly. From a month, i was planning wat to give him gift and took everything n went to meet him.
Asusual he didnt bring anything to me and i knew he wont. I myself brought extra friendship band and asked to tie me. Like this he came on my birthday and i went to meet him for one last time as he was going to get engage. We stayed together in hotel.
I had requested him to takecare of me for somedays as i will be lonely and usually i will not sleep at night due to which i had been to psycharists twice for sleeping pills.
Now he is got engaged. I am very happy for him but yet dono a kind of feeling disturbing me. Feels lonely like he too left me and gone.
Even after request he forgets me. Day and night he speak with tat girl but forgets tat he have a friend.
And i am fighting eveyday very badly and making him upset. The girl whom he marries is little orthodox. I am scared of this as well whether she ll allow our friendship. Its of 7 yrs friendship even though we fight but get back from fight very soon.
I had discussed this with him but he says give time but i am scared to give time. As times goes he may forget me bcoz all of sudden he stopped talking with me after engagement. Now after my fight he is chatting.
I feel very bad and awkard now that i am begging my friend to be with me everyday or i fight and make him upset.
I want him to be happy but i dono how to forget him. My health n mind getting worse day by day bcoz i am thinking alot of this. I could stop thinking even i sleep it comes as dreams n i started to scream in night n started to use avil sometimes took overdosage to sleep.
I tried mediation but couldnt concentrate in that. I badly feel like i want my friend back as he was before but tats not possible bcoz he engaged n going to get marry in 2 months.
Now i dono how to come out if this. I hate to be in pg. i just ran from came to home and planned to travel daily(app 6 hrs journey to n fro).
Thaught staying with family will not give lonely. But still i feel lonely n not able to sleep. Even today i fought with him tat he is not giving me time but he is not able to do it bcoz of work n ofcourse he should give time to her.
But i cant convince my mind. And i keep crying. Somebody help me how can i forget him?? I want him to be happy and even i should be happy.
But i get thaughts to die so that all problems ll be solved.
Brief Answer:
The symptoms suggest Adjustment disorder.
Detailed Answer:
Hello thanks for asking from HCM
I have read the details you provided in query and I can understand your concern. The feelings and symptoms you're having are occurring due to Adjustment disorder with depressive symptoms most probably. Both of you were in close friendship and then he got engaged. This is expected that he would become busy in work and his primary attention will shift from you to his wife.
Both of you never had any feelings other than friendship. Even if you had feelings but you never conveyed him. Due to that introversion probably he got engaged and now become busy in his life. Try to accept this. This is good that you are understanding that he should give time to her. Your conscious mind is accepting the things but unconscious mind is not accepting the change.
You have been taking pills for sleep and have depression symptoms like loneliness so I'd advise you to visit a psychiatrist again and discuss about treatment options. SSRIs like Paroxetine can be used in your case. Paroxetine will help in improving the sleep and will also help in reducing the depressive symptoms. The drug will help you in moving out of his thoughts. So please don't delay the treatment and consider consulting a psychiatrist again.
Thanks. Take care
The symptoms suggest Adjustment disorder.
Detailed Answer:
Hello thanks for asking from HCM
I have read the details you provided in query and I can understand your concern. The feelings and symptoms you're having are occurring due to Adjustment disorder with depressive symptoms most probably. Both of you were in close friendship and then he got engaged. This is expected that he would become busy in work and his primary attention will shift from you to his wife.
Both of you never had any feelings other than friendship. Even if you had feelings but you never conveyed him. Due to that introversion probably he got engaged and now become busy in his life. Try to accept this. This is good that you are understanding that he should give time to her. Your conscious mind is accepting the things but unconscious mind is not accepting the change.
You have been taking pills for sleep and have depression symptoms like loneliness so I'd advise you to visit a psychiatrist again and discuss about treatment options. SSRIs like Paroxetine can be used in your case. Paroxetine will help in improving the sleep and will also help in reducing the depressive symptoms. The drug will help you in moving out of his thoughts. So please don't delay the treatment and consider consulting a psychiatrist again.
Thanks. Take care
Above answer was peer-reviewed by :
Dr. Prasad
Thanks doctor. I had feeling of friendhsip only. But when somebody started to come in between us i couldnt able to take it. Even though when i conveyed myself, when friend sudden changed making to think alot.
Bvoz of my fight he is also upset. I dont want others to struggle for me. How to make my unconscious to understand and accept it?
Thanks doctor. I think i should go to psycharists as soon as possible. Every day i am getting worse.
Yesterday i couldnt sleep whole bcoz of his behaviour.
I am not able to concentrate in anything rather getting angry n irritated that he chAnged so soon for a girl and easily throws 7 yrs friendship.
Even though he knows all my problems he still does this to me being a friend. And tells i am helpless.
Bvoz of my fight he is also upset. I dont want others to struggle for me. How to make my unconscious to understand and accept it?
Thanks doctor. I think i should go to psycharists as soon as possible. Every day i am getting worse.
Yesterday i couldnt sleep whole bcoz of his behaviour.
I am not able to concentrate in anything rather getting angry n irritated that he chAnged so soon for a girl and easily throws 7 yrs friendship.
Even though he knows all my problems he still does this to me being a friend. And tells i am helpless.
Brief Answer:
Please consult a psychiatrist as soon as you can.
Detailed Answer:
Hello again
Yes, please consult a psychiatrist as soon as you can. Early intervention would help to reduce your depressive symptoms. Improvement in symptoms will result in improvement of focus and you will feel better.
Please don't hesitate to ask again for more clarifications.
Take care
Brief Answer:
Try to keep yourself busy.
Detailed Answer:
Hello again
TIME, time is the greatest healer. With time your unconscious mind will accept the change and you will start behaving normal.
You can shorten the time by a lot of things. Keep yourself busy, try to find new hobbies and you will see improvement in yourself. "SUBLIMATION" is one of mature defence mechanism. Try to convert the negative energy into some positive things like doing or starting a new work or learning a new thing. With work or learning your mind will get satisfaction and this will help you in forgetting the things.
Thanks. If needed consult a psychiatrist for treatment.
Please consult a psychiatrist as soon as you can.
Detailed Answer:
Hello again
Yes, please consult a psychiatrist as soon as you can. Early intervention would help to reduce your depressive symptoms. Improvement in symptoms will result in improvement of focus and you will feel better.
Please don't hesitate to ask again for more clarifications.
Take care
Brief Answer:
Try to keep yourself busy.
Detailed Answer:
Hello again
TIME, time is the greatest healer. With time your unconscious mind will accept the change and you will start behaving normal.
You can shorten the time by a lot of things. Keep yourself busy, try to find new hobbies and you will see improvement in yourself. "SUBLIMATION" is one of mature defence mechanism. Try to convert the negative energy into some positive things like doing or starting a new work or learning a new thing. With work or learning your mind will get satisfaction and this will help you in forgetting the things.
Thanks. If needed consult a psychiatrist for treatment.
Above answer was peer-reviewed by :
Dr. Nagamani Ng
Answered by
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