A few months ago, I experienced my first kiss with someone who was way older and more experienced than me. He leaned in to kiss me, and at first i dodged the kiss and went for the cheek and then he pressured me into kissing him by using guilt and saying "what you don't want to kiss me?" knowing that he could manipulate me into kissing me. Pressured by guilt I kissed him, and it was a terrible experience for me, as he kept trying to deepen the kiss and shove his tongue down my throat. Now whenever i think about this experience i feel sick to my stomach and induce a panic attack. is this normal and how can i begin to get over it?