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Dr. Andrew Rynne
MD
Dr. Andrew Rynne

Family Physician

Exp 50 years

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How Can I Come Out Of Depression ? I Am 30 Week Pregnant

hi doc i m 27 yrs n married in apr 11 and 30 weeks pregnant now ,when i m in my 20 th week i came to knw dat my husband had affair before marriage and supported her in every aspect(physically,mentally n financially) but didnt say anything abt the affair to me.i came to know through e mails n bank statements and sms(through hacking his system) .when i asked him earlier he denied but i showed him all proofs i had, he agreed and said dats before marriage but he also invited her to our marriage and still has all her contact information ,when i asked him to end up the contact wid her he says v r jst frndz . he didnt even tell me his bank details,never gives me his phone or laptop i m feeling frustated and betrayed by his words want to endup my life ,since i m pregnant i cant but i m crying all day long since 2 months cant bear all this anymore plzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz help
Tue, 8 Mar 2011
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Homeopath 's  Response
Hi,
welcome to healthcare magic forum,
we can understand that you are under a big stress, but during pregnancy it is very harm full both for you and for your baby, you should definitely ask your husband about all these matters but it is not the correct time wait for a period of time, first deliver a healthy baby and than question your husband. you cannot end up your life like this, matters can be solved but always with a cool mind, taking decisions like this will affect many life's.
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General & Family Physician Dr. Pragnesh Vachharajani's  Response
thanks for choosing health care magic.See patience pays always,you are facing difficult time of your life as well as best time of life,because too be a mother is most desirable thing in life and only this privilege is given only to females by god.So thank god for this.So any negative thought at this time insulting the mighty god.He will give you courage to fight this situation.Regarding the problem that you have ,please do not be very aggressive and keep your nervous under control.Talk to your best friend or any of your family member whom you trust.They will help you .talk to your husband at ease and difficult keep trust in him and love him,so it at all he is betraying you he should feel embarrassed.You may take help of an marriage counselor.buy and all the best for the time to come.
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Psychiatrist Dr. B Raghavendra's  Response
My views on this are very different from above expressed and I am giving this advice as both a professional and human being.

as a professional
1. a person's personality/character is mostly known by the way he acts. Behaviour is a better indicator of someone's character than what he says. Words can easily be faked actions are not so easy to fake.

2. Suicidal thoughts, hopelessness, sadness throughout the day are the given symptoms and are going on for more than 2 months. for diagnosis of depression we only need a month's duration. on top of it the stress is ongoing/continuing

3. Any depression antenatally (i.e before birth) increases your chance of post natal depression (depression after birth) and affects your bonding with your child consequently affecting his childhood development which is going to affect his/her entire later/adulthood.

4. A period of time away from the stress (respite) is one of the best things that you can have at this time (parental home????)

5. lack of confidants (somebody that you can confide in or tlak to about your problems), depression, unemployement are three of the four predictors of sucide/self harm in woman
so beware.

6. Professional/psychiatric help DOES NOT ALLWAYS MEAN THAT ONE IS MAD. STRESSFUL CONDITIONS ARE AS INDICATED IN SEEKING HELP AS IN MAD/PSYCHOTIC CONDITIONS

Good News
presence of children under age four is one of the best protective factors in women to protect against suicide/self harm so your future is bright, you just need to get over this time.......you will be able to solve this problem to your satisfaction


as a human being
In love one can forgive almost anything but if the mistakes keep repeating/continue and you don't have love, the children are the worst sufferers, apart from the parents. At the same
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How Can I Come Out Of Depression ? I Am 30 Week Pregnant

Hi, welcome to healthcare magic forum, we can understand that you are under a big stress, but during pregnancy it is very harm full both for you and for your baby, you should definitely ask your husband about all these matters but it is not the correct time wait for a period of time, first deliver a healthy baby and than question your husband. you cannot end up your life like this, matters can be solved but always with a cool mind, taking decisions like this will affect many life s.