Am I depressed? I m not happy about anything anymore. I can smile and laugh and pretend like I m having fun, but I m just not. Nothing seems to matter anymore. I only have physical feelings. I still cry, but only because I can t feel anything emotionally except wishing something would make me happy and wanting this to end. I guess I still love, but I don t feel it. I won t even let my boyfriend touch me. I get mad a lot. I have bad mood swings. My mother said I m acting psycho because I can be perfectly fine and seem happy and the next moment I m yelling about ridiculous stuff. I did it today, too. I was perfectly fine and then a conversation came up and I suddenly got agitated and defensive. I had no reason to. It wasn t even about me. I get mad about almost everything now, but I don t feel anything at the same time. If someone close to me were to die right now my only reaction would be no surprise. I don t know what s wrong with me, but it s affecting everyone.