Suggest Treatment For Severe Anxiety And Depression While On Lexapro

I ve been on Lexapro for 3 years to help with anxiety ,but found that is not helping me at all. If anything i feel that it has made me worse, i take it at night ( 10mg) and wake up with horrible anxiety which i can only calm down with 15mg valium! Now because of this evil drug im also addicted to valium. I have stoped Lexapro in the past (cold turkey ) and felt great but then i had another panic attack and my doctor put be back on this crap!!!!!!!! What do i do!!!!!!!!!! What other alternatives are there for depression and anxiety? I ve also read that taking Lexapro gives you permanent brain damage, is this true? I want to regain my life without these drugs!!!