My 44 yr old husband is on Mirtazapine (generic for Remeron ): 30mg po daily hs. He is 6 3 , 192lbs. He is having very strange, vivid nightmares pretty much every night; so vivid, in fact, he sometimes thinks parts of the nightmares actually happened. Along with the nightmares, he exhibits paranoia , mood swings, irritability , and borderline-personality-disorder traits. He refuses to continue with counseling, and has not told his dr about the side effects above. Without going behind his back or forcing him to take action, which may essentially lead to another argument, what do I do on my end to help?