Hi dear! Pain during first few intercourses is known and it is more in apprehensive girls.
This pain can be due to following reasons:
1. The vaginal muscls are very tight. If in aprehension they are contracted further, that will cause more pain. Even if they are not contracted, first few intercourses do become painful.
2. The
hymen gets torn during initial penetration. That can cause some pain.
To minimize this pain, I can suggest you:
1. Relax in the sexual play.
2. Use the lubricants. Please note that oil based lubricants are harmful to the women's genital organs and to the condom. So use only water based lubricants. Specific vaginal jellies also are available in the market.
3. Have insertion of the penis under vision so that the penis does not press on other sensitive parts of
vulva giving rise to pain.
4. Before insertion of penis, fingering can dilate the vaginal muscles, thus allowing the penile entry more easily.
5. Insertion should be done only after you are 'wet' due to increased vaginal secretions after sexual excietment.
Hymen now-d-days need not be torn by sexual acts only. Sitting astride like bicycling, tree climbing, excercises, mansturbation like things also tear the hymen. Also please remember that gentle insertion of penis may go on stretching the hymen and then tearing gradually which may not cause much bleeding.
In initial many intercourses, full penile entry is not possible due to tight vagina. It takes many months to year for full penile insertion. I have seen cases where in full penile insertion was possible only after first delivery. So do not have
stress of imcomplete penile insertion and hymenal condition. May be in first few intercourse only head of the penis will entre the vagina; still it will give you full satisfaction. Please tell your partnet to do it gently and patiently.
The use of lubricants do help early full insertion of penis without pain.
I hope I have answered your questions completely and thouroughly. If you have got any querries further, you may ask me. I shall be more than happy to qnswer them.