I Am A 60 Year Old Singie Father Diagnosed With

i am a 60 year old singie father diagnosed with major depressive order w/ chronic anxietydisorder diagnosed by the fed gov psychdr when i was 50 in addition i being 6ft. 3in 240 pounds i was alwaysemployed doing heavy construction work which ultimately led to multipledisc herniations surgeries and permanent sciatic nerve damge numbnessdown both legs foot drop et al once a promsing athlete i have much difficulty working easy part time jobs to supplement my ssd stipend these physical maladies exacerbate needs tobe social i rarely go out pain keeps me from driving my wife and fathers deaths this year put me on a disaterous spending spree that very much pleased creditors my fathers horrific dementia and death lrft me patriarc of my famly although his estate was poorly managed and mother tries best not to worry me further she at 79 will soon need me to aid her as any son should do sometimes even more troubling is the fact that the deppresion/anxety keep mefrom having friends a prisoner to my apt at times so many maladies that i feel writing is my only outlet kind of non-edited stream of consciousness tha my son enjoys and is impressed by thats my oneproud moment when he connects w/ and understands i take no meds however i have i learned the benefits and the caveatsthrough spots and workinjuries i probably have tantamount scorecard with evil kinevel one positive however i never used tobacco or alcohol probably keeps me alive thank you sirsfor caring