During the age of 5 – 10 years, children often mimic their parents. Parents are also amused to watch their children adopt their mannerisms. Children start developing the sense to not do something wrong. They also want to do everything right in this age. However, some difficult behaviors maybe seen in a child. It is important to understand that such behaviors stem from stressors around and the child is not being allowed to de-stress.

 

Difficult behavior seen during this age:

1.       The rigid child: children may sometimes worry excessively about unable to follow rules, unable to complete school work, getting bad thoughts, death of a family member or about their own safety.

2.       Difficulty concentrating: some children find it difficult to follow instructions of school teacher and they tend to fidget in between.

3.       Bed wetting: though most children are dry at night in this age. Some short term illnesses or stresses can occasionally become cause of bed wetting.

4.       Lying, stealing and cheating: this behavior can upset the parents more than any other harm inflicted. The child may just be saving himself of some punishment or may desire something that he believes his parents will not get him.

5.       Excessive withdrawal: bullying or low confidence can result the child to get withdrawn into their own world. They may become excessive television viewers or make imaginary friends. This behavior if stays beyond 10 years of age, can become more problematic. It is usually a strategy to avoid the real world. This can hamper in personality development. Stopping a bully can help recover from the behavior.

6.       Bullying behavior: stressed children tend to hit other children and this can take the form of bullying in school.

General rules for parents to follow with a difficult behavior in child:

1.       Have firm, consistent rules although these rules can change as your child grows.

2.       Allow child to have some say over rules and punishment.

3.       Understand that thoughts can be good or bad. Allow child to be easy on himself.

4.       Remain in charge as a parent and avoid getting into the trap of becoming a buddy to your child.

5.       Allow child to have frequent group activities with other children.

6.       Limit time to watch television and watch television with them to make it a social activity.

7.       Parents should make it clear to child that bullying is unacceptable and they should cooperate with school authorities to help child overcome this problem.

8.       Involve the child in relaxing activities like arts, music, dance, martial arts, gardening, sports, breathing techniques and meditation classes.

9.       Allow the child to show their creativity.

It is time to see a doctor or pediatrician if:

1.       Child seems to be delaying development in some area like speech, social or motor development.

2.       The difficult behavior is intense.

3.       The behavior is affecting child’s performance in school.

Ask A Doctor if your child is having any signs of some serious disorder like depression, anxiety, victim of abuse, agitated, lack of interaction with others, cruelty to animals or other children, self-inflicted burns, clumsiness or lack of balance while walking.

Management may include play therapy, parent groups, family therapy, babysitting workshops. For most part trust your own instinct as you know your child best. Look for any red flags that may point towards any serious underlying condition. If you suspect your child has some serious problem, please consult your family doctor or pediatrician.

 

Written by: Dr Vaishalee Punj