For the past five years I have been experimenting with prostate massage on and off. Until now I have not faced any major issues after each massage session. Well that is no longer the case, now my external sphincter muscle is weak and it will no longer close all the way. My internal sphincter is also quite weak but it stays closed unless I spread my butt cheeks, then it opens as wide as the size of a penny or dime. Also the area between the internal and external sphincter is very dry as well as the area beyond the external sphincter. I have a feeling that because it is so dry, it will not close. This problem began about 2 months ago when I purchased a new sex toy that was made out of some bad material such as phthalates. At the time I did not think much of the material it was made of because the box had said it was phthalate free. However after I did some digging it turns out that the company has a history of lying about the ingredients it uses in it s sex toys. And I do recall the toy giving off this strong chemical smell as well as an oily residue on its surface. It was approximately 6 long and 3/4 of an inch in width. So it wasn t very big. However the amount it stretched my external sphincter seems much bigger, why is this? I can still control my bowels. Are there any safe creams out there that can help heal the dryness? I was told organic coconut oil would help, is that true? Or will it cause an infection? I also want to know if the sphincter muscle exercises will help shrink the external ring over time. And if I don t massage my prostate anymore will the external anus ring (sphincter) return to its normal size?