Hi.
I have gone through your account, and i empathize with you on this.
When you say you have had 3 episodes in last 6 months, it must have been really bad for you. The way you describe the onset of the depressive symptoms is really articulate and gives me an impression you are really gifted in this regard.
Sleep disturbances, memory problems, irritability, headache are all understandable consequences of the
depression that you describe. Sometimes, dissociative experiences and feeling of unreality might accompany depression, in which case you might not remember your behavior at a later time. I feel your condition needs proper psychiatric care and evaluation. there are various treatment modalities currently available to help you with the problems, both medicines and
psychotherapy. They will surely benefit you.
Also,
nausea and headache might be having some other cause and needs to be looked into.
Keeping in mind all these, please visit a
psychiatrist and get yourself evaluated.
Hope this helps.
Dr A Rao Kavoor