Solution For Thumbs Getting Numb Due To Arthritis And Lymph Edema

My husband is not a hypochondriac. His problems are real. But, I have been hearing about his problems for more than three decades and got tired of it after the first few years. As a single child of older parents who both worked he had a lonely time of it. He had ulcerative colitis resulting in an iliostomy when he turned 21. In 1984 a drunk driver hit his truck, which rolled and he has suffered from arthritis and lymphedema ever since. Now his thumbs also hurt (arthritis). Sometimes he cries from the pain. But, I don t know how to handle it anymore. I have tried to tell him how tired I am of hearing about all the problems and how he seems compelled to give me long winded descriptions of his pain, often claiming that my legs [or whatever] hurt more than they ever have . For years, he has taken advantage of me and gotten me to do things that he should/could have done for himself or us. But, he s in too much pain or too sick . Is he malingering ? How do I deal with this? I m sooooooo tired.