I was diagnosed at age 26, now 62 with chronic depression, and anxiety. I have had a fully, successful life, happy, well-educated, great career, etc., I through my one and only marriage at age 38, and he was 42, never married either. I dated him for 3.5 yrs, and never saw any signs of abusivesness towards me, physical abuse, habitual lying, etc., We did marry in 1991, and he became an entirely different man? I call it Dr. Jekyll, Mr., Hyde! The night we got married he told me he made a mistake, we had no sexual contact, because he wanted to sleep, I stayed in the marriage, to find out that he had cheated on me when we were engaged, he began a habitual daily pattern of abusing me verbally, criticizing everything I did, never did anything with me, wouldn t put an extra phone in, because both of us worked for companies on the East coast, and he occupied the phone all day ! I lost my job over that. He never got me birthday cards, or believed in celebrating any holidays. My depression started to surface, and i was spending more time sleeping, and doing less, because of his disinterest in me, as well as our marriage. he began drinking, and this started battery towards me, terrible abuse, all night long. I had to start calling the police. I did put him into jail once. Eventually, after me working on a 25yr career, that I worked so hard to get, I could see I was losing it, because of my depression, and devastation about his treatment of me. I went to counseling about it. He never went, although I begged him to go? he divorced me. he then after two years, talked to me, and wanted to remarry me, and I made the stupid mistake of remarrying him. he became the sameman, yet even worse. I relocated to Texas, where he grew up, away from my family in CA., I started to drink out of loneliness. he just left me alone, traveled in his work, i could not get a good job, yet did work. I felt so empty inside, because he never had sex with me, ended up cheating on me, with a prostitute, he had a serious drinking problem, continued to hit me, verbally abuse me, to the pointwhere I went into the back bedroom, evwry weekend, locked the door, and was in bed at 7:00pm, until Monday morning. There was alot more that went on, he divorced me again, 4 years ago. In the past two years, I have suffered extreme anxiety, and depression, where I am in bed, and canot sleep at ight. I have become filled with anger towards him, for what he did too me, and my life! My question is, I cannot control my feelings of anger towards him, to the point where I get myself so upset, and yelling, because I am so filled with hurt. I am now seeing a psychiatrist and counselor. The psychiatrist is putting me on mood stabilizers, that are making me so, so sick, I cannot function! I do not think I am Bi-polar! I am having extreme anxiety, and extreme depression, as I had just once in my life so bad, at age 26! Doctor, don t you think I should be treated for the extreme axiety/depression with medication, and have the counseling work on my anger towards him hurting me inside so bad ? i am not having mania in the signs of happiness or risk taking, as a bi-polar personwould? Yet, my anger needs to be addressed? Thank You